Going back to the original topic of this thread...
Perhaps VRC is different - the default contact me message for us on EuroScope is "Please contact me on xxx.xx". This seems perfectly welcoming to me. As this thread has more than highlighted, there will always be pilots for which observer mode is more suited - for the rest of us, controllers are there to control, and most pilots seem perfectly pleased with that.
After all, we don't prefix every turn or descent with "please", do we