Jump to content

The funniest things you have ever heard while controlling.


Jake Sims 1158411

Recommended Posts

  • 3 weeks later...
  • 4 weeks later...

ABC123: ABC123 requesting clearance

(I talked to him on voice)

ABC123: im so sorry can you change it to text

MIA_GND: ABC123, Your cruise alt is incorrect for direction of flight..can you accept FL360 or FL380?

ABC123: rgr

MIA_GND: ABC123, FL360 or FL380?

ABC123: k

MIA_GND: ABC123, Please choose one.

ABC123: i already did

MIA_GND: ABC123, Which one did you pick?

ABC123: fl360

MIA_GND: ABC123, You never said that, but okay.

MIA_GND: ABC123, cleared to [airport] via the HEDLY2 departure, then as filed. Maintain FL360. Switch to Unicom on 122.80 after departure then resume own navigation. Squawk 1467.

ABC123: k

ABC123: rgr squak 1467

MIA_GND: ABC123, readback correct. Push and start at pilot's discretion. Expect Runway 8R for departure. Advise when ready to taxi.

ABC123: how do i pushback

 

 

Just..just..sometimes..

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Controlling Auckland Approach on a quiet day.

Me: UAL1, just confirm Push and Start NOT at your discretion?

Pilot (UAL1): Copy that, just figuring out how to close the doors mate.

Me: No problem, what aircraft are you flying?

Pilot (UAL1): PMDG 777, I've been known to take off with the doors open, standby.

Another pilot (UAE6951): Amateur mistake. amateur mistake, UEA6291, oh god, I cooked up my own callsign!, UAE 6951.

Later...

Pilot (UAL1): Holding A10, ready for blast off!

Me: That's a new one! UAL1, report airborne, runway 05R, cleared for blast off!

Pilots:

UAE6951: Wes Myer

UAL1: Gary Price

(I have consent from the pilots to put their names here)

Edited by Guest

Andrew Ogden
Gander Oceanic OCA Chief
Vancouver FIR Senior Instructor

Visit us: https://ganderoceanic.ca
Contact: [email protected] 

CZQO LogoCZVR Logo

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Later...

Pilot (UAL1): Holding A10, ready for blast off!

Me: That's a new one! UAE1, report airborne, runway 05R, cleared for blast off!

 

And this, ladies and gentleman, is the story of the transition from United 1 to Emirates 1. The end.

spacer.png

ACCNL5 (Assistant Training Director) - Dutch VACC

Link to comment
Share on other sites

One moment where I was controlling and Andrew Ogden, when he was controlling a TMA position above my airspace told me on TeamSpeak that a aircraft (can't remember his callsign) had been told to "contact Christchurch Control on 126.000" and then the pilot had read back instead saying "Contact Wellington Control", pronouncing the station he is handing off to wrong. Andrew on TeamSpeak said to me and also via ATC chat through EuroScope "That was a first, Wellington Control?"

 

Pretty gold. I got to say there.

 

Secondly when I saw on VAT-Spy 8 aircraft coming in a group into Christchurch Airport from Sydney and eventually as I hopped on to Christchurch Tower, one of the aircraft, ANZ884 flown by Ablai, who I ended up remembering from Matt Davies' video had been PMing me telling a aircraft to slow down so that he can win a race and to maintain separation. And in the end when all the aircraft landed, I transmitted over the frequency "Well that was a cavalry" and one of the aircraft replied "Haha yeah it was."

 

These moments were so cringeworthy and as a controller, I found it although a little immature, I found it quite funny. It was fantastic.

Zain Khan NZAA - 1345074

 

Enroute Controller (C1)

Pacific Oceanic Partnership Oceanic Endorsed Controller (/O)

VATSIM New Zealand

 

http://www.twitch.tv/zkaviator

http://www.instagram.com/zkaviator

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I saw it on the DutchVACC forum last week.

 

It would have been funnier if he replied with: "I read you 1. Please check your keyboard." (instead of "readability 1, please check your microphone" if on voice).

spacer.png

ACCNL5 (Assistant Training Director) - Dutch VACC

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

On text today:

 

PILOT: so can we talk on here

PILOT: like general

CONTROL: Pilot, Thats a Negative Captain for free talk you can switch over to a Private Message however before we proceed any futher I would like to inform you I'm in a happy relationship with my girlfriend lol

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Got this a few days ago on Gatwick Delivery:

"XXX with you, stand ..., requesting clearance".

Me: "XXX I haven't received your flight plan, please refile."

"XXX, flight plan refiled."

Me: "XXX, I still haven't received your flight plan, please confirm callsign and that it's filed for a departure from Gatwick."

"XXX, why would I file from Gatwick, I'm departing from Heathrow on stand ..."

Me: "..."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That moment when LON_W_CTR is extremely quiet and the controller is extremely chill.

 

LON_W_CTR: "BAWxxxx, .........................." (something I didn't quite understand, heavy accent involved)

 

*10 seconds later, no readback*

 

LON_W_CTR: "Okay then. BAWxxxx you can go over to Unicom one two two decimal eight. I'm being ignored wehhh wehhh"

 

Controller, you know who you are and you are my favorite London Controller

spacer.png

ACCNL5 (Assistant Training Director) - Dutch VACC

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Was flying while hearing this but still funny nonetheless. Happened during the Boston FNO - I was departing.

 

Controller: "Cleared direct OSHNN, hold at OSHNN as published, expect further clearance (time)Z, time now (time)Z"

 

Pilot: "Okay, cleared direct OSHNN, we'll hold there, and by the way, we don't know how to fly a hold"

 

Controller: "Wait... what'd you say?"

 

22
Link to comment
Share on other sites

*Flying out of Amsterdam to Gatwick*

 

"Ehhh Amsterdam Radar, TAY01... Did the Amsterdam control area expand or should I go to Unicom? I'm almost above Great Britain..."

 

The controller wasn't having a good day, but it made him laugh. Glad I could help

spacer.png

ACCNL5 (Assistant Training Director) - Dutch VACC

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

Yep. Then came the control and landed everyone on 22.

 

Another one.

A pilot keeps asking for his own headings and altitudes during an event.

Controller: XXX, we'll get you through this. For now maintain your heading and altitude. We'll get you to the ILS, I promise.

KntU2Cw.jpg
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Please sign in to comment

You will be able to leave a comment after signing in



Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...